Autumn, feels like winter to me

It is the end of October, and it is cold to the bone, wet cold. It is dark when I walk in the morning now. I treasure the time. I have seen the moon shining on the ocean, so bright that I don't need street lights to walk under to see perfectly. The other morning there were shooting stars to wish upon. The night was so clear and crisp, breath taking.
It will be winter soon, and normally I fall into a slump for November, my month of the dead. Forget a day of the dead, mine is the entire month. I feel blessed, sacred this time entering into my dead month. I don't know why, maybe I am just too full to feel the deep sense of inertia that hits me. I am full of work, of children, grand children, of early morning walks on the ocean. I am but a bit of sand - there is a world bigger than me. Ocean.
My Tom died on the 12th, Gramma the 13th, last term miscarriage on the 16th, mom on the 19th. Goodness of the month: my baby boy was born on the 3rd, my tia on the 13th, dear meln the 15th, and baby girl on the 27th. My life has always been chinese sweet and sour. Happy and sad equally mixed, and just is, order carry out...
Here is to crisp apples, warm drinks, good friends and music in the month of the dead. Cheers.