Today, my oldest son is going to the funeral of a friend he has known from high school. There are things I wish I could save my children from experiencing. The tragic ending of a friend being one of them.
20 years next year I was the same age when I lost my best friend, her husband and their two darling babies. The weekend before, Kate and I sat in front of the corner market, in my car nursing our babies while her just a bit more than baby daughter (2year old) slept in her car seat. Life was perfect: warm summer night, conversations with an old friend, sliver moon and all the stars on display. Babies suckling as we caught up on all of the happenings of our older boys, our husbands, families. It was one of those quintessential evenings to be remembered a life time.
That's the thing about sudden death, you never know you are the only one going to be remembering. You may say goodbye, but you never mean it for the rest of your life. I wanted my tragic death stories, my mom when I was 15, my friends, my love to be enough. I have experienced the death, therefore my kids get to live without the fear of the phone call in the middle of the night. The knowledge that one moment in time, however long it was, has to be enough, enough mothering to get you by raising your children, grandchildren; enough love, enough laughter...
If one person has to bear tragedy, why should anyone else? Who indeed wants to be in 'the loser' club? Life is precious, no guarantees -
Here is to you Collin.
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1 comment:
i am so sorry for the loss.
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